Ghazals are an ancient Persian poetic form, and they are a good way of trying to let go of prose-like sense when writing poems.This is a prompt given by NaPoWriMo and including the A to Z Challenge of letter "S", I am going to try writing a Ghazal for 'S' - Sound of Music.
Sound of Music is a (1959) is a musical film by Richard Rodgers.The story is about a woman leaves an Austrian convent to become a governess to the children of a Naval officer widower.Many songs from the musical have become standards, including the title song "I have confidence", "My Favorite Things", "Climb Ev'ry Mountain" and "Do-Re-Mi".I chose this as my prompt for the above challenges.
How to write a Ghazal :
- Ghazals are composed of couplets – about five to fifteen, so they’re short.
- The first couplet of a ghazal introduces the theme, which traditionally tends toward longing, erotic or otherwise. Both lines of the first couplet end in the same rhyming word or phrase.
- The second line of each succeeding couplet uses that rhyming word or phrase as well.
- Traditionally, you’re supposed to include your name, or a veiled reference to it, in the poem.
SOUND OF MUSIC
Lingering soul, I am between the classics
Drowning inside each and every Sound of Music
Raindrops, pitter -pattering its footprints
Clusters of sound creating a "c-h-o-w" Music
Some days these beats of rain control my tears
Soaking in my sorrow in hers, accompanying Music
Showers of drizzles precipitate, on a sunny day
A dancing Rainbow bending colorfully to the Music
Drop by drop as each pebble touches its skin
The waters in pond spread its wings smiling in Music
Thunders and lighting, the big uncle rain coming
Drums beating ' Sky Orchestra', a big festive Music
Every special occasion are marked by this sound
All festivals and celebrations possess their Music
The sounds of Music “Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti To”
Have their presence in every piece of Music
My Baby laughing, surprised hearing different sounds
That intrigues her mind tickling her sense of Music
I sit here on the window sill admiring every of piece sound
Drowning in dancing the rhythm of this unique "Music"
Link to follow :
beautifully expressed.
ReplyDelete"My Favorite Thing" IS music (period)
ReplyDeleteThe show "Sound of Music" is quite close to my heart. My son played the part of Kurt in summer stock for a summer when he was eleven. It was a great production with Anna Maria Alberghetti playing Maria. You start and end with those references but your marvelous Ghazal freely explores the natural music you find every day which show us your "favorite things".
I very much enjoyed your piece, here and learned a lot from it. It has the "sounds" of poetry that John referred to in his article. Thank you SO MUCH for writing and linking! Looking forward to reading more. Gay
nice...i really love the natural touches and sounds and their acknowledgement as music...nicely spun...
ReplyDeleteI love music and use of it here. Great work. Love to learn from great writers.
ReplyDeleteah what a musical ghazal...i like the sky orchestra..
ReplyDeleteHi, my feedback is based on these five factors starting from a traditional perspective but also looking at modern developments. I draw on Agha Shahid Al's, chapter from An Exaltation of forms (Ed Finch and Varnes). Looking at your guide, I'm glad to see I'm not saying much different except I make more of the need for the poem to be associational and the use of an internal rhyme.
ReplyDelete1) Association
One of the key factors of the form - traditional or modern is that the couplets need to be based as it were on variations on a theme. And stand alone as the order should not matter. This you have done.
2) Theme
This is clearly about longing so fits with the traditional form.
3) Couplets
You have done a nice number with no enjambment. And you clearly fit the narrator/writer in the last couplet.
4) Rhyme and refrain
In the classical tradition, the opening couplet would set the refrain as the same in the end lines as well as establish the internal rhyme. Then in the rest of the couplets the refrain and rhyme would be on the second line. You have the refrain but no internal rhyme as I can see.
5) Metre
I don't think you have gone for a regular metre but you seen to have a pattern of a long/short in the couplets. But it performs well when read.
In short, it falls well within the range of classical Ghazals.
This is great I was able to follow the imagery as if a shot film as playing in my head. Yes!
ReplyDeleteYou have chosen a theme for this write that would have me hooked even IF the writing was bad...but I think it's outstanding! When I was younger, every Christmas I would fall in love with the Sound of Music over again. Thank you for the wonderful writing, and the wonderful memories!
ReplyDeleteHow beautiful! I really liked how you have associated the various seasons and moods with music.. it's really very nicely done here...
ReplyDeleteAnd considering the form of poetry here (Ghazal), I think you have chosen the PERFECT subject for it.. music..
Very well played, Uma..
A musical ghazal... very lovely to read ~
ReplyDeleteYou did wonders with this form ~