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Friday 13 August 2010

The Story Of Titanic With A Different View

With some modulation and to better understand the concept of my poem , I am posting again my oldest and best poem "TITANIC". I wrote this after watching this touching movie...really touched that it ended me in writing a poem about it.

This poem is based on a man, the Captain’s best pal and First Officer William McMaster Murdoch.
Murdoch was the officer in charge at the bridge when the Titanic struck the iceberg on 14 April 1912. There are varying accounts as to what orders Murdoch gave in order to avoid collision with the iceberg.Also he is depicted as an honest officer who struggled to save the people from sinking but at last committed suicide on the great Titanic regretting his mistake of killing a man. Read the poem to get more out of it and notice that each sentence ends with rhyming end.
TITANIC( A one man story begins....) By Uma Maheswari.A


To read the book of the Sea
I started my life as a sailor
I traveled in a ship named titanic
Which I never knew, at the end, would wreck
I saw all kinds of people, young and old
And the rich people dressed in emery and gold
To the view I could reach, I see
A tiny dot, the head of the harbor
I saw a baby boy cry so high
Which startled a brown-bearded guy
I went to the deck to look below
To view how beautiful the water flows
And to see how the shark paddles is fun
Under the great ship which runs

I could see my captain eyes so proud
Looking gracefully around the moving crowd
I went near him and gave him a smile
He said, “Oh! My boy we are almost near Nile”
Then at noon, I was asked to dine in a precious hall
Where good sketches and rare paintings decorated the wall
Sipping in great anticipation of pleasure
We made a stimulating conversion of Titanic as treasure
Nearly three thousand people are on our (titanic) land
Along with merry cookers and bright solo band
Each had their own enjoyment and party,
The Upper class with meat and wine and the Lower with tea


Deep fear and horror struck my heart
When I heard of the ship going to have its last bath
Hit by the glacier gave the ship a big hole
Which is going to swallow the life of the whole
Sunset cloud carved with soft knife fill the sky
And our great titanic like tigers track (in snow) slowly moves by
Inside the big room, the captain and the crew made a move to find
A way to escape with a heavy heart and disordered mind
Soon the message spread out like swarm of bees in the air
And there seemed confused face filled with wrath everywhere
Soon preparation were made to carry women and children in boats
And for people who don’t know swimming were given swimming coats
Some men’s were fierce to escape along with children and made fuss
Some didn’t try but slept in silence since they felt things are hopeless
Measures were made fast to preclude the entry of water from all places
And for me, things meant impossible for the water seems to take its race




Bad! At last ,the ship was being sucked in like a dog’s bone
And the poor people, some nearly flat with fright gave a dull moan
One by one, the boats went on as it was decided
In front of those men who are growing pale and red
The great ship was being sucked in very fast
And still thousands of people were left at last
Our captain the real men was sad enough to miss
Our Ship, so he went went inside his room to give the ship his last kiss
Like sudden bomb blast, waters broke into the windows
And in every place I could hear people crying and their furious roars
People who told that it was pleasure to travel in titanic
Now started to blame the ship feeling tired and sick

I tried to control the people with my gun
Targeting at those people who tried to run
Becoming rage with anger at a man who was going away from my will
Off I took my gun and aimed at him to kill
He fell down giving me a startling look near my arm
And all the people around me was shocked to calm
Ashamed of my work, I aimed at my head with my pistol
I shot with a sudden jerk and down I fell
I could no more hear the cries coming from the Titanic, the ship
A wonderful treasure, which we had and still keep


________________________THE END_________________________

Hi , I request you all to watch this video from youtube.I have been very lucky to have got this ,very apt to my poem.




24 comments:

  1. really gud! Its taking time to read it fully
    -:)

    Super

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  2. yes but its a story...though long it contains most of the details what you saw in the orginal Titanic movie

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  3. i loved murdoch's character. it was a truly a tragic ending for him but he was one of those who stayed in your mind long after the movie was finished. this was a nice story you've written. :)

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  4. vivid portray of the titanic experience,
    I feel it,
    what a tense write.
    beautifully done!

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  5. @ ALL....A very touching love story but it has different story line for each character be it
    1)Jack or Rose
    2)Captain Murdoch
    3)Cal Hockley (Rose' fiance)
    4)Captain Smith

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  6. You've done a great job of telling the story of Murdoch -- both heroic and tragic.

    Well done!

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  7. A fantastic and heart rending narration! It was like watching the movie all over again! Very well done, my friend...

    And thank you so much for linking it with poetry potluck... this really was a treasure!!

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  8. @ALL Thanks..this is my first long narrative poem with rhymying ends and I like it fully :)

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  9. I just loved your poem..I guess such emotion can be very effectevly elaborated by a female poetess. I still remember how bad I felt about Jack dying in the end. All I have to say is..

    Untill Today I felt sad for Jack
    I was upset that why he could not get a floating sack.
    But today I realized that there were also other people in the Titanic which made it so great
    And I will surely remeber your story till my last date..

    Should I try writing a poem or what ..kidding great work I am really happy I got to know your poem ..

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  10. @Harshad
    I agree with you since most of the time women are more sentimental than men.Women tend to rely on emotional feelings more ,with each drops that the eye melts ..you can see a story behind it.
    Thank u for dropping by

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  11. I enjoyed reading your piece and applaud your choice of writing it from Murdoch's perspective.

    If I may, I think you mean "sea" not "see" in the first line. Good luck with your writing.

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  12. @Fireblossam -The typo was corrected.Thank you for dropping in

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  13. Thank you for visiting The Friday Forgotten and linking your post. Your imagination and creativity should never lie dusty in a dark corner of your blog. We are happy to help clear away the cobwebs.

    I never really considered the perspective of Murdoch till now. Thank you for that thought inducing tale.

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  14. @Thefridayforgotten
    True and Thanks for dropping by :)

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  15. i enjoyed this .. the easy flow made it worth finishing fast !

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  16. The Titanic also touched me deeply but good for you - you wrote a poem while I wallowed in depression for days. Glad I survived those feelings to be reminded again with a nice poem this time.

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  17. Terrific historical-fiction, prose-poem! Mine is so simple in comparison!
    http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2011/03/13/big-love/

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  18. SUPERB poem! It was sheer pleasure to read it!

    Here is my Sunday Scribbling post:
    unknown gap

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  19. Wow, Uma. Powerful take on this tragic story from a different point of view. I like it that you took it in that direction. Thanks for sharing it.

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  20. Found you hanging at liv2write2day and followed your link here.

    This story of the Titanic is at times real, at times surreal. Its epic length helps make it a fine tribute to "the ship God himself could not sink"...and yet, in man's hubris lies the fault.

    Great work! Amy
    http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/07/28/grass/

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  21. quite a long poem but joy to read

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  22. Too many people commenting, and referring to the movie. FORGET THE MOVIE! The Titanic was a real ship; it really sank, killing a lot of people. The movie was a load of rubbish - just Hollywood melodrama and romance. Get real people!

    Your post is very well written though.

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